After being on such a high all week today I woke up crash down on the bottom of a heap. I feel like I’m on an emotional rollercoaster right now and I’m screaming to get off. Today I woke up feeling bitter and angry. The two emotions I do anything to avoid. I know it’s not good for me to allow the actions of someone else to make me feel this way and surpressing it is worse (I’ve become an expert at this but thanks to my writing I’m learning to release). I just want to shout “I fucking hate you for what you did to me.” but at the same time I know I did it to myself. I ALLOWED someone to make me feel this way and in actual fact it’s myself I’m shouting at.
When something isn’t right in our lives or is making us unhappy we should walk away. Why stay around and be subjected to circumstances that don’t reside well with us? I’m always telling my children that if someone is being mean and horrible to them to just walk away. This is one of the best lessons I can teach them in hope that they will take it into their adult lives. They will learn to remove themselves from any situation that doesn’t feel right wether it be relationships, jobs or uncomfortable situations.
I’m tired of having such great days to waking up to days of complete sadness. I have no one else to blame but myself and everyday I wake up I am trying my utmost to make myself happy and content. I’m avoiding people and situations which will jeopardise that but sometimes it’s difficult because I’m a person who doesn’t like to hurt or offend but it’s about priority….them or me!!!